Let's start with a disclaimer:
I've ALWAYS assumed that the kiddos would NEVER grow up to be rocket scientists, heart surgeons, nuclear physicists, or any other crazy thing that could actually SUPPORT me in my retirement.
HELL, I knew LONG ago that the next generation's Einstein was NOT living in MY house!
I KNOW that my parenting skills are NOT that good!
HOWEVER (and it's a big fricking, HOWEVER)
I DID assume that at least ONE of the four would grow up to be competent enough to choose a decent nursing home for me once they've driven me to the brink of insanity!
It turns out, I'm probably going be covered in bed sores, pi$$ing my bed, and desperately SCREAMING for the nurse to bring me the "good" meds (as legally allowed, of course) because tonight PROVED that the kiddos don't have a fricking CLUE about ANYTHING!
What I went through tonight just PROVES that if the kiddos are anything less than a "burden on society"....
I did my job, and I did it all while avoiding that padded room (barely).
Welcome to this evening's events:
I just have to tell the story as it happened. If I ramble, then get the frick over it.
I was downstairs, ignoring the fact that my kiddos are probably up to no good after I put the Ref into the shower:
Suddenly, I hear....."MAMMA!!!! HELP!!!"
I dash upstairs to find the Instigator trying to clean up all of the glitter, that the baby "threw in the air" with, of ALL things, a BLOW DRYER!
While I'm on my hands and freaking knees trying to clean up the flipping "glitterstorm" that she caused, I hear a random scream about how it's "RAINING downstairs!!!!"
I run downstairs (glitter STILL on my face, I'm sure), only to find a WATERFALL happening in the basement!!!
Apparently, the Ref didn't have the forethought to know that shower curtains and the absence of randomly throwing water out of the fricking shower are NOT favored upon!
I go downstairs and find a WATERFALL of ignorance!!!!!!
The ONLY saving grace is that the Instigator was "smart" enough to throw a freaking TISSUE on the floor to clean it up!
I'm not talking about "puddles" here, I'm talking about an absofuckinglutely FLOOD of the basement!
My BIGGEST hope for my old age is the Instigator.....HE at least threw a freaking TISSUE on the floor to sop up the mess!!!
If it had been some randomly evil plan to have fun.....I could respect it, but......sadly, NO.......
it was just outright stupid.
