Well, it's official!!
My kiddos and I are now living the Northern life!
While it's always nice to get back to my roots, this time is much more difficult than I ever imagined.....
"Visiting" my hometown is MUCH less stressful than actually LIVING here
(especially when you factor in the kiddos' born and raised Southern blood)!
Let's just say, we've suffered through our fair share of bumps and bruises on this new chapter of our lives....
Wait a second, let me back up.....did I just say "chapter"?
With all that this past week (that's right, it's only been ONE week!), I could already write an entire NOVEL on the chaos we--and by "we", I mean "I"---have had to endure!!!
Characters:
Stressed out Mom, the "Ref"--7 yr old who HATES change, the "Instigator"--6 yr old who will create issues just to make himself laugh, the "Princess"--4 yr old who is POSITIVE the world revolves around her, and the "Bean"--18 mos old who has managed to acquire EVERY personality flaw of her older siblings!!!
Supporting Characters: Mama dog with her OWN issues, and devil puppy
CHAPTER 1: PACKING
It sounds simple enough, doesn't it? Take everything you own, throw it into a few boxes/bags and move onto the next room. (Let me assure that is NOT the case with us!)
Picture this:
Mom on a mission who has to decide EVERYTHING the kiddos and she will need to take--but there's a catch (isn't there ALWAYS a catch with my family?):
Since you can't physically FIT 4 car seats and a driver in a moving truck, our entire lives need to fit into a 4X8 trailer (because that is the biggest one we can tow) and the remaining space of the minivan. (OK, I can handle that! I'm always up for a good challenge anyway!)
OK....I've got a plan now, and I know what we can/can't take with us......
unfortunately, everything I DO pack ahead of time (i.e.-toys they NEVER play with, clothes not quite weather appropriate yet, and flipping baby memory stuff that they have NEVER wanted to look at before) is suddenly strewn all over my living room floor because it all, suddenly, the COOLEST stuff on the planet!!!! I had to repack EVERYTHING about a dozen times!!!! OH! Let's not forget devil puppy's role in all of this!!! Let's just say, that some of the first photos of the kiddos, first school crafts, etc......are now being partially used as fertilizer for my old garden!!!!
CHAPTER 2: MOVING DAY
WOW! It's finally time to load up the trailer and go!!! What's that you say? Despite what your internet site told me, my van, in reality, can NOT tow ANY trailer?!?!?!? Do I seriously need to grab your scrawny little, gas station owning, redneck throat to make you understand my week?!?!? Now, mind you, we tried to move a week EARLIER, but the company reserved us a trailer at a place that does not even CARRY trailers anymore!!! So, at this point, I was ready to go all Danny Glover "SNAPPED" on the man!!
Now, my survival instincts kick in:
Plan A--scrapped
Plan B--ripped out from under me
Plan C (a cargo carrier)--unavailable
PLAN D!!!!!!---rearrange the seats in the van, pack whatever you can.....and GO!!!!
Picture me throwing bags of clothes down the steps, out the door and into the car....
all the while, Mama Dog is darting in and out of the house ensuring that I will get a phone call in the near future about, yet another, litter of devil pups we can't get rid of!!!
CHAPTER 3: THE DRIVE
Oh, Dear Lord!!! I'm going to have flashbacks just thinking about this!!!
It's a 10 hour drive, folks......and that's withOUT pit stops or stretch breaks!!!
Not even 10 MINUTES into it, I hear my first, "Are we there, yet?!?!"
You have GOT to be kidding me!
My answer: "Nope! And the next time I hear those words....I will start driving in circles just to make sure we are not there for another YEAR or so!!!"
(Actually, a proud Mommy moment for me, as I didn't hear it ONCE more the entire trip!!)
The first stop was a lunch/potty break not even 2 hours into the trip.
I sincerely apologize to EVERY other person in that McDonald's that day!!!
This was, by FAR, the worst my kiddos have EVER acted in a restaurant of ANY kind!
It was enough to make me seriously reconsider the move!!
Imagine, if you will, Chicken McNuggets being thrown at other children, chairs being knocked over, the "Bean" running up the big kid tunnels and Mama chasing after her, and let's not forget.......4 other kids screaming, "EEEWWWWW!" as the "Ref" let one rip right in the middle of one of the maze tunnels!!!
"Princess" decided that this was soooo funny she would snort chocolate milk out of her nose onto the "Instigator"'s food...oooohhh! you do NOT mess with him when it comes to his food!!!
Enough said......45minutes later.....we cut and run so fast that they are lucky to be a fast food chain, and we had to pay up front!!
We really did make great time, though...for one reason and one reason ONLY:
I could NOT physically spend one extra minute in the car with them!!!
The rest of the trip went like this:
Princess: "I'm too cold!".....Ref: "It's hot in here!"
"I dropped my drink!", "The radio's too loud!", "I can't hear the song!"
and, the oh so popular....."I think the 'Bean' pooped her diaper!!! Open a window!!!!"
Seriously, anyone who wants a large family should be FORCED to take a 10+ hour trip with four kids ALONE before they are aloud to do so!!!!
CHAPTER 4: SETTLING IN
Are you serious?!?!?
We've only been here a week, and we are living in my parents' basement!!!!
There is no Chapter 4!!
I'm writing the sequel as you read this!!!!
PLAN D!!!!!!---rearrange the seats in the van, pack whatever you can.....and GO!!!!
Picture me throwing bags of clothes down the steps, out the door and into the car....
all the while, Mama Dog is darting in and out of the house ensuring that I will get a phone call in the near future about, yet another, litter of devil pups we can't get rid of!!!
CHAPTER 3: THE DRIVE
Oh, Dear Lord!!! I'm going to have flashbacks just thinking about this!!!
It's a 10 hour drive, folks......and that's withOUT pit stops or stretch breaks!!!
Not even 10 MINUTES into it, I hear my first, "Are we there, yet?!?!"
You have GOT to be kidding me!
My answer: "Nope! And the next time I hear those words....I will start driving in circles just to make sure we are not there for another YEAR or so!!!"
(Actually, a proud Mommy moment for me, as I didn't hear it ONCE more the entire trip!!)
The first stop was a lunch/potty break not even 2 hours into the trip.
I sincerely apologize to EVERY other person in that McDonald's that day!!!
This was, by FAR, the worst my kiddos have EVER acted in a restaurant of ANY kind!
It was enough to make me seriously reconsider the move!!
Imagine, if you will, Chicken McNuggets being thrown at other children, chairs being knocked over, the "Bean" running up the big kid tunnels and Mama chasing after her, and let's not forget.......4 other kids screaming, "EEEWWWWW!" as the "Ref" let one rip right in the middle of one of the maze tunnels!!!
"Princess" decided that this was soooo funny she would snort chocolate milk out of her nose onto the "Instigator"'s food...oooohhh! you do NOT mess with him when it comes to his food!!!
Enough said......45minutes later.....we cut and run so fast that they are lucky to be a fast food chain, and we had to pay up front!!
We really did make great time, though...for one reason and one reason ONLY:
I could NOT physically spend one extra minute in the car with them!!!
The rest of the trip went like this:
Princess: "I'm too cold!".....Ref: "It's hot in here!"
"I dropped my drink!", "The radio's too loud!", "I can't hear the song!"
and, the oh so popular....."I think the 'Bean' pooped her diaper!!! Open a window!!!!"
Seriously, anyone who wants a large family should be FORCED to take a 10+ hour trip with four kids ALONE before they are aloud to do so!!!!
CHAPTER 4: SETTLING IN
Are you serious?!?!?
We've only been here a week, and we are living in my parents' basement!!!!
There is no Chapter 4!!
I'm writing the sequel as you read this!!!!
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