I remember when I used to wake up every morning smiling, refreshed, excited, and ready to tackle each new day HEAD ON......
then I had kids!!!
Someone please tell me why, no matter HOW much sleep I get, I can't just wake up in a somewhat "normal" way!!!
It's never the alarm clock, the sun shining through the window, a neighbor's dog barking somewhere in the distance, or, GOD FORBID....my body just deciding it's ready for a new day!!!
My morning wake up calls all tend to be some version of a cruel college prank!
TOP 10 LEAST favorite wake up calls:
10. "I'm THIRSTY!!!".....REALLY?!?!? You can't get that on your own?!?!? When I offered to get you a drink last night, you stomped your feet and told me how you were big enough to get your own drink!!!
9. The puppy farting in my face.....thank GOD that one's not an issue anymore!!!
8. the Bean touching my face....I know this one sounds bad! She is being soooo sweet trying to caress my face and all, but, with my eyes still closed, all I think of is some creepy a$$ spider crawling all over me!!!
7. Waking up SOAKING wet and wondering what in the FRICK you were dreaming about to make you sweat so badly......then realizing.....it's NOT sweat.....SOMEONE peed the bed!!!"
6. I'm THIRSTY!!!".....REALLY?!?!? You can't get that on your own?!?!? When I offered to get you a drink last night, you stomped your feet and told me how you were big enough to get your own drink!!!
5. Nightmares. Nuff said!!! I have my OWN frickin' nightmares to deal with kiddos!!! Why do I need to hear you screaming at 6AM when you can't even remember what the dream was about?!?!?!
4. Facebook.......yes, I KNOW that I can set my phone to stop my notifications at 4AM! Here's the problem.....I have already tried to join Facebookaholics Anonymous, but they keep refusing my friend request!!
3. "I'm too scared to go upstairs alone to pee!!!".....SERIOUSLY?!?!?! You weren't too scared to go upstairs alone, grab a stool, and open the box a cookies an HOUR ago!!!!!!
2. HEADBUTT!!!! .....this daily alarm has not quite found its place on my cell phone!!! It usually involves the Bean trying to get closer to me by crawling on top of me, losing her balance, and crashing and burning into my forehead!!!
1. NOTHING is worse than the wake up call from a knee planted firmly into your NOSE!!! Thank you, PRINCESS!!! It's so common that I am pretty sure it's a preset message on my phone!!!! She can not stand to be away from me for even a second, so if SHE wakes up, and I am not RIGHT next to her.....that means that I wake up...with 2 black eyes and a story I can't quite explain!!!!
9. The puppy farting in my face.....thank GOD that one's not an issue anymore!!!
8. the Bean touching my face....I know this one sounds bad! She is being soooo sweet trying to caress my face and all, but, with my eyes still closed, all I think of is some creepy a$$ spider crawling all over me!!!
7. Waking up SOAKING wet and wondering what in the FRICK you were dreaming about to make you sweat so badly......then realizing.....it's NOT sweat.....SOMEONE peed the bed!!!"
6. I'm THIRSTY!!!".....REALLY?!?!? You can't get that on your own?!?!? When I offered to get you a drink last night, you stomped your feet and told me how you were big enough to get your own drink!!!
5. Nightmares. Nuff said!!! I have my OWN frickin' nightmares to deal with kiddos!!! Why do I need to hear you screaming at 6AM when you can't even remember what the dream was about?!?!?!
4. Facebook.......yes, I KNOW that I can set my phone to stop my notifications at 4AM! Here's the problem.....I have already tried to join Facebookaholics Anonymous, but they keep refusing my friend request!!
3. "I'm too scared to go upstairs alone to pee!!!".....SERIOUSLY?!?!?! You weren't too scared to go upstairs alone, grab a stool, and open the box a cookies an HOUR ago!!!!!!
2. HEADBUTT!!!! .....this daily alarm has not quite found its place on my cell phone!!! It usually involves the Bean trying to get closer to me by crawling on top of me, losing her balance, and crashing and burning into my forehead!!!
1. NOTHING is worse than the wake up call from a knee planted firmly into your NOSE!!! Thank you, PRINCESS!!! It's so common that I am pretty sure it's a preset message on my phone!!!! She can not stand to be away from me for even a second, so if SHE wakes up, and I am not RIGHT next to her.....that means that I wake up...with 2 black eyes and a story I can't quite explain!!!!
I'll be the first to admit that these kiddos have GOT to get their own places to sleep....
but, I have to admit,
they make me appreciate that annoying buzz of the alarm clock soooo much more!!!!
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