Choose Your Words Wisely

Most people who meet me realize in the first five minutes that

I HATE LIARS!!

Even the kiddos realize this to the point that they will rat each other out at the drop of a hat for telling a lie.

A recent argument even involved a heated exchange over whether or not you can go to jail for lying.

(try explaining the concept of perjury to a 4 and 5 year old!!! The whole idea confused them so much they just gave up the whole argument to get away from me!)

I have never, not ONCE, "lied" to my children....not even little white lies or lies of convenience.

I do have to admit, though, when you are dealing with 4 little ones so close in age....

you figure out ways to "choose your words wisely" so you don't actually HAVE to lie....

I prefer to think of it as:

CREATIVE VOCABULARY

For example:

1.  When you stop at the convenience store

(for a little "mental health management" type beverages, you know):

"Mommy, can you get us candy?"....."I'll see...." (Flash Forward to returning 30 seconds later...) "Did you get us candy?"...."Ummm, I didn't see any" (of COURSE I didn't see any.... I NEVER LOOKED DOWN THAT AISLE!)

2.  If you are too annoyed to go looking for their cup, toy, shoes....whatever:

"Did you find my stuff?"....."No, sorry baby....I can't find it" (It's NOT lying!!!  I never looked for it in the first place, so NO I couldn't find it!)

3.  The kiddos want a snack 10 minutes before dinner:

"I'm HUNGRY!!!....."Well....dinner will be ready in 10 minutes...so good!"...."But I'm STARVING NOW!!! I need a snack....something chocolate!".....I'm sorry, but if you tell your kiddos that "WE don't eat chocolate in this house" it's completely TRUE when YOU eat it all within the first 5 minutes of buying it!!!....not WE....just ME!!

4.  When they want to play on the computer (and you KNOW it will be for the next 4 hours!):

"Sorry, Sweetie, but I can't get nickjr.com to come up"......of COURSE I can't!!!  (I blocked that stupid website after you hijacked my computer a year ago!!!!!)

5.  When you need a moment outside, alone, to reboot your sanity, and one or more kids come break into your 'happy place':

"Mommy, I NEED o tell you something!!" ...."It can't wait until I come inside?"...."NO! mmmm.....let me think..." ......"While you 'think' about it....I will be out here thinking about all the stuff you did to make me need to get away in the first place!"

Alright....

That last one's not even funny....

but, sometimes, the truth is better than fiction!!!!

Now, I just need o go outside and breathe before the inevitable bedtime battle begins!!